Found Treasures: The Heffer
The first treasure I'm going to write about is my first boombox. Do you remember these brown things? They were heffers. This tape player could be used instead of a hammer to build a house -- it's that heavy. It should be something you keep by your bedside at night if you live in a rough neighborhood.
Oh, how about a nice tape of music to fall asleep to? Don't mind if I do.
Wait, did you hear that? Someone's trying to break in.
Thank goodness I have my trusty brown Fisher-Price tape player that, compared to a Walkman, has a be-donk-a-donk. It'll knock that robber's face in.
This tape player allowed me to listen to my numerous editions of Wee Sing. Do note that I couldn't get enough of Wee Sing: Silly Songs. It taught me that if my name was Michael Finnegan, I would die and begin again. It also taught me that because I'm fat and stupid, I should just go eat worms, among other life lessons. This tape player, ehem, I mean boom box, taught me how to sing.